image & power, ii

My bracelet, after Alex lost interest

Well, as usual, I can’t thank you guys enough for sharing your wonderful thoughts about the questions posed in my last post. I found it interesting that many of you agreed on the “empowerment” part of blogging – I agree with you as well, but I hadn’t even considered that aspect of online journaling when I posed the question. Well done. Many of you spoke of a “limited sphere of influence” you felt you had through your words – and that’s closer to what I was thinking. Those of you who mentioned that you remain anonymous on your blog, or have in the past, I think understand what I’m about to say. But for me, the "Anonymous reader" hit the nail on the head.

I’m of the opinion that most of us bloggers wield immeasurable amounts of power in our words, and we don’t even know it. And I think this power comes from, bear with me, stereotypes.

Now don’t get me wrong – I have a real hatred for stereotypes – both good and bad – because in my opinion, at their roots stereotypes are based on ignorance. For this reason, they cloud the truth about individuals. Unfortunately, I don’t think stereotypes are something you can avoid – because even the most enlightened and open-minded of us do it. Our views of the world are inevitably coloured by our own limited experiences. So even if we made a conscious effort NOT to stereotype, we probably would never be 100% successful.

For this reason, I know that every person with whom I come in contact with has a preconceived notion of what they think I’m likely to be. And I think this is true of people who first come to Chookooloonks, as well. At first glance, I’m a black / parent / adoptive-mom / lawyer / person-from-a-Third-World-Country / interracially-married / woman / engineer / Texas-A&M-graduate / and-the-list-goes-on-and-on. And with each of these attributes, a preconception might be formed. “I know she’ll be like this because all engineers are like this.” Or “I know she’ll be like that because all women are like that.” And so on. Some of those preconceptions might be positive, some might be negative. Whatever.

Here’s the thing: once that person reads Chookooloonks, and starts getting a sense of the person behind the blog, perceptions might be changed. S/he may walk away thinking, “Gosh. I had no idea that adoption could be like that.” Or “Wow – so that’s what the Caribbean is like. Hmm.” Again, these new perceptions might be positive or negative. I make no judgments.

But think about it: if this is all true, then through my words, I have the power to affect how people think. That, my friends, if you’ll pardon my coarseness, is some Heavy Shit. And I’m not special – this is true for everyone who publishes their thoughts for the world to read. I mean, think about it: imagine if, because of your words, someone from a foreign country, maybe even a country whose government hated your homeland, walked away feeling an affinity with you? Or imagine if you were a member of a group who routinely suffered discrimination, and because of your words, a bigot changed his mind? Or imagine if someone who read your site, and learned you survived some horrible setback and are now doing fine, as a result decided against suicide? I’m not saying these sorts of things happen routinely – far from it – but I do think they happen, and as far as I’m concerned, one more ally, one less bigot, one more person choosing to live, is HUGE.

So, again, I think bloggers wield a vast amount of power. Am I conscious of this power every time I throw a post up? Of course not. Most of the time, I’m just expressing myself. Other times, I’m kvetching. Still others, I’m just blown away by the magic that is Alex, and I feel the need to share it. And perhaps the truth is that it’s better that I’m not conscious of it, because if I were, my posts might be less than honest. But I don’t think that means the power goes away.

And I think that’s profound.

What do you guys think? Do you agree, or am I just talking out the side of my neck? Again, be as honest as possible -- even if you have to fake your name to do it!

Comments

[Wimindance]

Yes, blogging (particularly when that blogging is heartfelt and honest) can change lives. I agree completely.

Further, I think living honestly does exactly the same thing. I'm a lesbian woman working in a white-collar profession made up mostly with straight white Republicans. Just living my life, honestly and without apology, has changed the mind of more than one colleague.

Thanks, Karen, for giving yourself a voice and for giving many of us a chance to overcome our own stereotypes.

[arubagirl]

I see what you're saying, but I don't blog to have any sort of influence, but if that sort of influence happens, than great.

[Kellie]

This has nothing to do with your post, but I saw some footage of Angelina Jolie carrying her daughter through the airport. And her daughter was dressed in this white bunny suit, I think it's the one you were going to buy for Alex for Halloween last year.. or were thinking of buying.

[dave / higher powered]

Living by certain principles is what matters to me. By living them, I try to practice them, all day through each waking moment. Am I perfect at this? Hell, no! But I try, usually my best. This goes for my writings. ie: my Gratitude list.
What are these principles?
Honesty
Integrity
Compassion
Faith
Hope
Courage
Humility
Discipline
service to others
and a conscious contact with my Higher Power

[Lu]

Yes, you are talking out the side of your neck...just kidding. I think what you have to say does make a whole lot of sense. Like I said, I had no idea people were digging the quotes I would post. Hell, I did that for me so that I was uplifted. Knowing that someone else was also lifted by the words was icing.

Words can be empowering and influence people. I guess that means we all have a responsiblility, right?

[Hmmm]

Karen, I think you are so right on this one! I hold a particular religious/political worldview about which people have a LOT of negative stereotypes, and it really blows my mind when I get an email or comment saying "If I met someone with your background outside the computer I would never listen to a word she had to say, but you have helped me understand that your people are not evil." (Or something like that.)

It's awesome, but also a bit daunting, because it makes me more conscious of the power I have to create an image with my words. Which is exactly what you were saying, I think. Way to go on this discussion.

[MamaChristy]

Beautiful Karen - I agree with everything you said except one thing:

"And I’m not special"

Yes, you are. You are delightful, eloquent, and open-minded. Unfortunately, not all bloggers are such. Some perpetuate stereotypes and not everyone is so honest as you.

That said, I think that there are far more good people blogging (and far more good people in the world) than there are people who are deceptive. And I have some wonderful - very different from me - blog-friends (blends?) who I wouldn't have met without this wonderful, funny medium.

[Margaret in Germany]

I think you definately hit the nail on the head with this one.

There are so many bloggers posting about everyday life and their obstacles. These are the ones that keep me returning daily (sometimes more than once a day) to read what they write. Do they influence me in some way or another...of course!!

My family does not know that I blog. I think that if they did, I would censor myself, something I promised myself that I wouldn't do.

There IS power in the written word...in both cyberspace and on the bookshelf.

[tanyetta]

I decided to BLOG to initially update family member and friends. We live in California and most of our friends and family live on the East Coast (New Jersey). I missed a few days of blogging and I received emails from people asking if we were ok and that they look forward to receiving the updates. Soooo with that said, you never know who you're touching with your words/lifestory. You've definitely touched me with your blog!

[Reneé]

Karen, As a general matter, I believe blogging expands our individual sphere of influence beyond what we can do in our physical realm, both deliberately and unintentionally. With regards to you, your words always provoke and usually enlighten me. What keeps me coming back to your blog, among the millions on the Internet, is the extraordinary power of your photographs. I love learning about you and the world you live in by peaking through your viewfinder with you.

Blessed be,
Reneé

[Redhead]

I have begun thinking that stereotypes go beyond ignorance. I think they're the unfortunate fallout of a brain that uses shorthand to navigate the world. We need to 'learn' and organize quickly to go through our day, (you can't keep re-learning the aspects of 'chairs' or 'doors', you learn them, group them, and move on). This is fine for many things, but it's a blindness we have to work to overcome. I think it leads to stereotypes. ('like us' - 'not like us')
As an aside, it also can fool us into thinking we 'know' something we don't. When we name an illness a 'cold', we are deceived into believing we know what it is - we don't. We have only named it, not understood it. Sorry for the length.