a post of endings, beginnings, but most of all, gratitude

When I began Chookooloonks back in early 2004, its sole purpose was to keep family and friends who lived all over the world up-to-date on how our adoption was going. Being as un-web-savvy as I was, I thought making the site private would result in it being far too difficult for them to find -- as far as I was concerned, the obvious reason to make the site public was so people who already knew about it could find it easier.

I know. It made no sense. And I clearly had no idea.

Anyway, as word seemed to get out about Chookooloonks, I remember it coming as quite a shock the first time someone I didn't know commented on the site. Good Lord, I thought, people are actually listening. And even though I found receiving the comments exhilarating, I also realized that I had to be very careful about how I used my words to ensure that my family's privacy wasn't breached, particularly Alex's. I never wanted her to look back and discover that I'd not respected her in some way, by publishing something on the web that she would end up regretting. I also rather quickly made a promise to myself that I would end Chookooloonks sometime before Alex's third birthday, in order to mitigate any chance of that happening. Picking her third birthday was admittedly sort of arbitrary: my earliest childhood memories are from when I was three years old, and I figured it made sense to stop when Alex was at or near a similar age.

Well, my little kumquats, her third birthday rapidly approaches, and lately I can't seem to shake the feeling that it's time to retire Chookooloonks -- at least in its current form. I've decided to replace the journal with a pure photoblog -- to keep my photography skills sharp -- but I'll no longer be updating my thoughts in this format, on a quasi-daily basis.

When I began this blog, I had no idea how much I'd love keeping the journal, considering that I've never been much of a "diary" person. It's pretty amazing how much creating Chookooloonks has helped me both personally and professionally, and as a result, I'm feeling very, very grateful. In particular, I owe thanks to:

- Heather for her doociality; also Megan, for tirelessly answering the neophyte questions of a total stranger ("What is this ... blog ... thing you do?") almost three years ago. It is because of both of them that I took the plunge.

- In no particular order: Tina, Irène, Mir, Jen, Andrea, Chris, Nancy, Kristin, Lisa, Georgia, Tonya, Attillah and Carmen, for extending your friendship beyond the comment boxes on our blogs. I'm better for knowing you. I mean this truly.

And of course, thanks to all of you who have visited here to share your thoughts, advice, encouragement, funny tales and touching stories. Thanks especially to those of you who've taken the time out of your day to e-mail me and let me know how much the site has touched you in some way. Your support has meant more to me than you could ever know or understand, and it's what makes doing this shockingly difficult. I hope you'll continue to visit me at the photoblog (in a few days, the URL http://www.chookooloonks.com will take you right to it), and if you do, I hope you'll leave a comment saying you were there.

Anyway, it's my sincere wish that you'll continue to find ways to express love, both on your sites and in your everyday lives. (For what it's worth, Irène and I will still be scouring your blogs for images for the Love is All Around site, and I'll keep adding names to the kind blogroll as long as you guys continue to show interest). I suspect that I'll continue Love Thursday in visual form on my new site, so, of course, feel free to continue to look for and share links to your images there (and the Love Thursday Flickr Pool) as well. Most importantly, however: I really hope you'll continue to be kind to each other.

Remember: love is the only rational act.

And with that: many, many blessings from our home to yours.

With love,

Karen, Marcus & Alexis

Comments

[amy]

say it isn't so! i jumped on the chookooloonks bandwagon a bit too late! thanks for all you've shared.

[marileeit]

oh it makes me so sad to think you won't be blogging anymore. i felt so privileged to have a glimpse into your life. good luck and may joy follow you always.

[rachel]

I, too, am so sorry to see you stop. I think you have a wonderful rationale behind it, though.

I look forward to your photoblog and continuing to watch Alex grow.

Thank you for sharing your lives with us.

[Tug]

I'm so very very sad...yet absolutely understand. You have always made me smile, both with your words and pictures - a truly kind person. I hope to continue to find that with your beautiful pictures - thank you for letting me get to "know" you a little, and best wishes to you & your family always.

[Meepers]

Nooooooooo! Ahhh, Karen, I understand, but know that you're doing the best thing for your family. I'm sure I'm just one of many people who will miss 'hearing' your words on a regular basis, but will look forward to seeing your beautiful photographs. All my best from Santa Barbara. Maya

[Colleen]

Your quasi-daily blog postings will be dearly missed but your desire to move on and change format is something I completely respect and understand. Thank you for sharing a bit of your life with us and for reminding us to see and acknowledge love, beauty and kindness everyday.

You've been an inspiration!

[chris]

I will miss your blog. Your kindness and friendship have been a true blessing.

Love to you.

Let the email stalking begin ;-)))

[Natastic]

Congratulations! I'm always so excited when you launch a new endeavor. And I'm an enthusiastic fan of your photography, so I'm thrilled to watch your new site as closely as the blog. XO, N.

[Margie]

And I just started reading here!! But it's so hard to keep up with writing and life, and sometimes the best choice is to let something go.

I'll be looking forward to your photo blog, and to your posts on Anti-Racist Parent!

[Shannon]

I began reading Chookooloonks only this fall, but I'm so very glad that I happened upon your blog when I did, thanks to the site Afrobella. I've so enjoyed your blog entries, your photography and your insights on love, life and motherhood. We are all very fortunate that you chose to share yourself with the world in this way.

Best of luck to you and your family!

BTW, your photography has been my inspiration to break out my camera and capture the world as I see it. Thanks again!

[Lara]

BUMMERAMA!

I just happened on your site somehow a couple of months ago. I don't really know you, but you helped me set up my Kind Blog link and answered many questions about Typepad for me.

I totally respect your decision. You are clearly an amazing person and I will keep chookooloonks bookmarked to check out your photography.

Good luck to you and your amazing family!

Lara

[Ninotchka]

Typepad ate my comment? I said, I will definitely stay tuned and will continue to contribute to Love Thursdays. Also love the quote:

Remember: love is the only rational act.

SO TRUE!

Be well, karen!

[aidelmaidel]

So sorry to see you go - I hope you change your mind - if not now, at some point in the future - I've been reading since near the beginning - my younger child is a few months younger than Alex. I wish you all the best and I can't wait to see more photos!

[cagey]

Wow. I always get teary-eyed when one of my favorite blogs closes shop.

The power of blogging should never be underestimated.

Peace.

[Funchilde]

Wow. It has been such a pleasure to watch you and your family grow, change, love...and thank you for confirming that there are still GREAT people in the world, all we have to do is look. Your words will be missed.

[Kristin]

If I didn't know I would be continuing my real life friendship with you, I would be uncontrollably devouring cheese doritos and sobbing wretchedly right now.

But since I'll still be seeing you, I'll just add that you and your exquisite character and your distinctive words will be missed by thousands. You are one in a billion.

Now, what about that novel?

[Girl con Queso]

You'll be missed.

[Island Spice]

Wow. I am near tears for real. I think I have to email you with my comment...

[trini fan]

Aww say it isn't so. My daughter is almost 3 as well & your site gave me such assurance & could lift my spirits up any day. But I understand. Another site I used to check out "trixie update" was discontinued for the similar reasons. Wow, 2 of my favorite parenting blogs gone, well thank you for continuing the photo blog. And thank you for letting me see what a wonderful life you live & you have shown me how one can be beautiful in all ways of life. All the best.

[julie]

I'll miss your beautiful words, but as they say a picture is worth a thousand words, so I'll stay tuned to your photoblog.

But maybe, just maybe, you can write a letter every now and then and post a photo of it?

No?

Thank you for sharing your life with us. You have a beautiful family and a beautiful spirit. All the best.

[Nicole]

I visited fairly often and don't know if I've commented before... I just wanted to know that I will miss this blog a lot. Your love for Alex and journey to adoption is such an inspiration. It made ruminate about it that much more. For what it's worth, you are a fantastic blogger and I am sad to see you go, but you need to do what is best for your family. Best of luck in all you do!

[Sylvie]

Oh no! You'll be missed. I found your site a long time ago when Julia linked to it, and I always clicked over to see Alex's smiling face from when she was a baby. Good luck with the photos... Your blog inspired me to start my own when we got to Mexico so our families could keep up with us. And your description of the turtles hatching has inspired me as well: I'll be there one day on the beach to see it too. Good luck!

[Jenijen]

ack! I understand, but, oh, I'm sad!

[shel]

i'm going to miss your writing and your great anecdotes. you and your family have been an inspiration to so many. i'll look forward to continued inspiration from your photographs!

much love and happiness to you, marcus and the most stunning alex. happy holidays!

[Mrs. Flinger]

I think I'll blame pregnancy hormones for tears because really, it's so silly to cry. As someone who loves to read and rarely ever comments for fear of (re)making a total ass out of herself, I've always appreciated and loved (LOVED) how wonderfully kind and warm you are and your wonderful way of encouraging and fostering that warmth in everything you touch. I will continue to appreciate your photos but will miss your words. :-)