Some random thoughts on expressing your beautiful different:

1. Dress to amplify, not camouflage.

Here's a secret: there are no such thing as physical "flaws." There are certainly differences, but not flaws.

So given this, forget about the idea of dressing to "camouflage." Instead, decide what it is you love about yourself, and amplify it. Do you like the shape of your lips? Wear big, bold lip colour. Love your legs? Wear sky-high heels. Have crazy, curly hair (ahem)? Wear it as big and insane as you can.

(Men, do the male equivalent.)

Make the thing you love about yourself your trademark.

2. Become known for your passions.

The things you love to do -- the things the light you up -- are part of your beautiful different. So don't hide them.

If you love to cook, cook for everybody you can -- family, friends, coworkers.

If you love to paint, or sculpt, or make art -- do it. Decorate your house or your office with it.

If you sing, join a band. Or a choir. Invite people to hear you perform.

You know that saying about not hiding your light under a bushel? There's wisdom in that. Let the world know what you're great at.

3. Lead with love.

This is pretty self-explanatory. Given the choice, choose love, every time. Related ...

4. Give more than you get.

Compliment coworkers for jobs well done. Mentor a promising protégé. Send a thank-you note or gift. Do kind without expecting anything in return. And finally:

5. Learn to say no.

Two great pieces of advice I received from two different friends comes to mind: the first once told me to "lower my expectations, but not my standards." In other words, lower my expectations, so that I don't get disappointed; however, keep my standards high, because regardless (and pardon my language) I shouldn't have to put up with shit.

The second friend has a saying: choose discomfort over resentment. She meant it's always better to say "no," and endure any attendant discomfort in doing so, than to say "yes," and spend time afterwards resenting that you did.

So check in with yourself, and when you know the answer is "no," say it. Do so as kindly but as firmly as possible. Become known as someone who can be counted on to speak her truth.

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